Marriage is a grace; but then life is a grace if we have the understanding to appreciate it. Today the grace of a wedding will occur in countless places where community will witness the commitment of two people in Holy Matrimony. In the West we know this as a sacrament. That means that we are participating with the wedding couple in something holy or sacred and by our witness we all touch this initiation. This is the mystery.
I wonder what that first time or moment between bride and groom held in its mystery? One thing that certainly was present was the promise of this day. And in the genealogical mapping we have the promise of humanity. The wedding couple brings two cultures and two families and two people to one. That is a lot of twos and a brilliant one. They are two families that now create one new family which holds two stories that embrace and fulfill lives, their own and then, possibly, ours.
Community is significant in and for all weddings — for the declaration of a new family to be heard and acknowledged. We give our support. We honor the promise. We stand in the mystery together. We stand with the parents to honor them and the preciousness of knowing their families continue now in a new beginning — one that perpetuates something ancient.
When the couple has the benefit of entering into marriage with the support of their families the sky opens. In our times of splintered ambitions and affected promises this means that they have the grace of blessings. They have seen the other’s shadow and in the challenge of shadow they have held each other. This is another grace. This is the foundation of intimacy, to have found trust and faith with each other.
Many of the witnesses today are married or have been married and know dearly that family deserves patience and kindness in its core. If we can, for a moment, recall the promises we felt at the moment of deep aliveness in our own weddings we can touch magic. This is the magic of love. That energy is the mystery that initiates us to deeper living and calls us to pay attention to the life of the other.
Weddings are beautiful and they make us all more beautiful. I thank couples for marrying and calling us together. We can play with them in this mystery of life and begin to love life with hope and new promise. We might recall from our school years that there are 3 Graces: Charm, Beauty, and Creativity. This wedding evokes all three and our bride and groom embody that richness.
Grace is also known as Charis (charities). Thomas Merton, the 20th Century contemplative writer, monk, and mystic thought that the most important word in the New Testament was Charity. He might have said Grace. Divine Grace is a part of every recorded religion. That grace is the one that regenerates and sanctifies us. Isn’t that the hope of a wedding and a marriage? Annie and Arjun are honoring their love here with us as witnesses in a ceremony to sanctify two lives and regenerate the family story. We can do the same with them and together with the people in our lives that matter to us.
Carl Jung, the Swiss spiritual psychologist from the 20th Century, spent most of his creative life engaging the sacred marriage within each person, what we call in Latin The Mysterium Coniunctionis. He gave us a model for inner work that is mirrored in the physical marriage. In marriage we have the possibility to internalize the other and grow into a new wholeness. Life is holy when we live in sacred ways to honor values and walk the path of love. May Peace and Strength bless the wedding Union.